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It goes back to caveman-clan mentality, says Fisher.

Guys don't want to let anyone they perceive as the enemy into their inner circle.

There is also a chance that you’re lucky and you are currently your nerd’s project. Don’t get too comfortable because he’ll move on, and, when that happens, you’ll be wondering what happened to all the attention. Regarding gender: for this piece, my prototypical nerd is a he as a convenience.

There are plenty of she nerds out there for which these observations equally apply. It’s clichéd, but a nerd is defined by his computer, and you need to understand why. A nerd has a mental model of the hardware and the software in his head.

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First, a majority of the folks on the planet either have no idea how a computer works or they look at it and think “it’s magic.” Nerds know how a computer works. When you ask a nerd, “When I click this, it takes awhile for the thing to show up. While the rest of the world sees magic, your nerd knows how the magic works, he knows the magic is a long series of ones and zeros moving across your screen with impressive speed, and he knows how to make those bits move faster.

The nerd has based his career, maybe his life, on the computer, and as we’ll see, this intimate relationship has altered his view of the world.

He sees the world as a system which, given enough time and effort, is completely knowable.

This is a fragile illusion that your nerd has adopted, but it’s a pleasant one that gets your nerd through the day. Whereas everyone else is traipsing around picking dazzling fonts to describe their world, your nerd has carefully selected a monospace typeface, which he avidly uses to manipulate the world deftly via a command line interface while the rest fumble around with a mouse. Grab that seemingly discarded Mac Mini which has been sitting on the floor for two months and hide it.

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