Wasn’t I the same person who vowed to never date a man with a child? There are other men who are single, childless and worth getting to know. I was up for the challenge, and decided to give it shot.
Alas, I admit, those were my exact words, but those words were also spoken by a much younger and not so much wiser version of myself. Obviously, there are several issues to deal with when someone has a child. Do you think you’ll get jealous when you have to share him, and can’t throw a tantrum because you’ll ‘look bad’ for being jealous of a child? trying to pacify the mother so his relationship with his child isn’t affected, and keeping his ‘woman’ comfortable.
Before you even think about introducing your children to your new boyfriend, you need to have been dating for at least six months. It takes at least six months to begin to really know a person. Group Setting: Have the first five meetings in a group setting.
You don’t want that to happen again and you certainly don’t want your children to go through that again.
I did this once and, let me tell you, I learned my lesson.
These days it's becoming more and more common for someone to enter a relationship with children from a previous marriage.
There are a lot of ways that you could react to discovering that he has children, but if he truly is the man of your dreams you should be able to have a relationship with him and with his children.
This article first appeared on Gal By Marina Sbrochi You thought dating was hard the first time? You don’t want to introduce someone and one month later have to explain to your children why they don’t see "Mike" anymore. Telling your children they have to be nice or like someone is a sure fire way to ruin the meeting. For instance, a backyard BBQ with friends and your new man. Trust me, going slow now will ensure you have success later. One Mom, One Dad : Reassure your children that they only have one mom and one dad. I told my children this a few months after I introduced my then boyfriend to them.
I have learnt through maturity and life’s little lessons, that limiting yourself or options because of the checklist of the perfect man or ideal relationship you have etched in your mind doesn’t actually prove to be realistic. Yes the other woman; the ex who will always be present in both of your lives. Will your plans get rescheduled at the last minute, because something came up with the child or because of a situation with the other parent? Can your significant other manage any possible drama? And let’s be real, what about feeling secure about your relationship when you see him with her and their child, looking like a happy family unit? Still, it was a great relief to have taken that step. another thing with dating someone who has a child is this…
But while it isn’t the ideal situation for some women, is dating a guy with a child really all that bad? It very well depends on the man, and how serious he is about getting into a committed relationship. When my guy mentioned that he had a child, I admit that the fear factor did set in. Having to deal with the ‘chile mudda’ may not be one’s cup of tea, but this is one of the things you may have to do while you’re dating your guy. something even more special is added to the relationship, as the guy would have to trust you to take such a big step in introducing you to his prized possession, and it’s often a good sign that he takes you seriously.
As the words tumbled from my mouth, all three gave me ‘the look’.