Dating basics

We ended up talking on the phone for two hours and 49 minutes (he timed it).

When our almost three hours of questions, answers and jokes were up, I felt more like my old dating self again.

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That’s why it’s important to recognize the warning signs!

Whether you call it “dating” or something else, all partners should agree on a definition and the same ground rules for the relationship.

“Dating” means different things to different people, particularly across generations.

(1) KNOW YOUR INTENTIONS Are you looking at dating as only a means of finding a future spouse?

While it could potentially be the end to the means of dating, finding a future spouse should not be the main intention of dating.

When he wrote down his phone number and suggested that I his number. If he didn’t answer, I would leave an embarrassing voicemail message a la “Singles” and pray for the best. While they appear to make things easier, they have, in reality, only served to increase my potential dating phobias and make me feel more disconnected. I’m talking about general patience when it comes to getting to know someone new. I would waste weeks listening to records or playing Ouija board, kissing and holding hands with a guy, before I even considered whether or not I would want him to be my boyfriend.

Sure, there is less risk involved in sending a text message, but there is also less reward. Electronic communication allows you to remain aloof and mysterious and unflawed. And then I waited out the five hours and 37 minutes it took him to call me back. That allow you to try new things in the presence of a new person. I think just because I am older and have a clearer idea of what I’m looking for, I rush.

We use the gender-neutral term “partners” to refer to people in an intimate relationship, but you might use a different word (and that’s okay)!

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